Harpenden 3 Knobs 0

The achievement of the day seemed to be getting to the ground- albeit 10 minutes after kick off time. Whenever this happens a team starts in disarray and inevitably gets worse and loses. This time proved no different but we battled hard against a better, more inventive and fitter side so there was a slight positive. If we'd been cued in from the start, if we'd had any luck and if they'd been cursed we might have got something from this game but it wasn't to be.
The referee was a star- a starfucker but a star. He'd announced his credentials pre game by informing us that he'd sent off someone last week for calling him a twat. Old Owens goalie, I think, early in the game. So we were warned. He insisted on delaying the late kick off even further with a performance Ann Widdecombe would have been proud of and we bullied off.
True to his word he picked up every curse going and was a bit of a pain, though fairly competent if a bit of a twat!
They proved dangerous on the break with two fast, skilful forwards proving a handful for Chris and Brendan. Full backs needed to tuck in more for cover yet we got to half time, kicking uphill, only the one goal behind, a good shot, tipped onto the post by Trevor, but slotted home by their man who proved the most alert. They were quite dangerous at sniffing out, contesting and picking up the second balls as we stood back admiring some challenge or the other at the first one. Andy was played through and a rasping drive turned over by a very competent keeper. We had lots of corners, nicely delivered, but proved less than interested in really attacking them. They were fairly committed in the middle at the back. One powerful header clear before half time came after their centre half had clattered through Richard. A definite penalty, not given. They were denied one at the other end shortly afterwards and they hit the bar with the ball probably crossing the line but a combination of no Russian linesman and no goal mouth technology got us off the hook. I think I was embarrassed but only for a minute. An eventful first half.
Full of confidence during the half time chat we immediately conceded a poor second goal when play re started when twice they were hungrier for the loose ball than we were. Lots of people said it was Brendan's fault, I'm not too sure. They were really stretching us now. If we supported in attack we proved too light at the back during their speedy counterattacks, if we didn't support going forwards, what little attacking enterprise we showed was down to individual bursts. Players were outnumbered and isolated. Darren H was played in and was tackled hard and fairly by the centre half. It was an excellent tackle saving an certain goal. Richard was clattered for a penalty but the referee (Mrs Twat) consulted their linesman, a substitute, who surprisingly said the foul was outside the area. Idowu couldn't have launched himself that far man. Anyway we were 3-0 down by that time having earlier conceded a header from a corner.
Well done chaps- we'll beat them at home.
If you have not contributed a few bob towards my anti bear farming campaign- 75 miles walked last week- please take heart and do so.
Cheques to "WSPA" or donate to www.justgiving.com/Ronald-Crennell. Come on I just cannot believe you think this is not a worthy cause!
I will never surrender.
Presentation night next Friday at The Station, Knebworth with Fanny Jordan on barbecue duty.
Next Sunday another tough game v Saints. Ron was linesman for the whole game today, everyone was playing so well. He will be back.

"Flag up his arse most of the time and comforting it was" wrote this dirge.