Darren 2, Blunham Vets 3, Knobs 0
It was a grey November morning when we emerged from the great green shed to confront our aggressors, Sandy masquerading as Blunham Vets, but where were they? According to Sir Ron they don’t normally kick-off ‘til 11 and this Sunday was no exception, so after a 30 minute warm up inside they eventually took to the field, looking like cats, waiting to pounce.
Our side was, perhaps, a little less able than usual, having had to cope with several defections during the week. Once again this gave us the chance to field our new Icelandic international, Rooney Gudrunnersson and with some changes at the back to ensure that the opposition would appreciate the value of true pace we got the game going.
A couple of early scares helped to meld the back four into a more effective unit in the first half despite a combined age of 105, and that was just among the centre-backs. We passed and parried, parried and passed, but in the end could find no way past and after 45 minutes we felt that we had accomplished something with the score staying at 0-0. All this despite their two front runners being quite lively, not surprising really since one of them, Nunu by name, looked considerably younger than his claimed 39 years. Its been a long time since I lived North of Watford and I had obviously forgotten what a hard life whippets don’t have!
The half time talk by Sir Ron was inspirational. “f**k me lads, we’ve got a chance here” lifted our spirits, at least until we kicked off again.
Within what seemed like seconds our fortunes were on the wain. With all the guile and finesse of a pregnant ballet dancer, an innocent enough looking cross was deftly flicked over Trevor’s head and into the gaping net....by Darren. “I haven’t done that for years” seemed like a satisfactory explanation at the time.
Yet a few minutes later Darren went for his second. A vicious cross fired in from the left found our right back doing his Mike Tyson impression on the goal line, his neck and head disappearing into the gap between his shoulders leaving just a pair of eyebrows and a yet-to-be-balding pate to head the ball away, or in this instance to head it into our open net for a second own goal. Never mind Darren, we don’t blame you – just thank god you didn’t go for the hat-trick.
Things settled down again for 10 minutes when we pressed for an opening to start to make things even. To be fair we were having just as much of the game as them and we thought we were still in with a chance. To Bully, to Darren, to Brendan, to Twiggy, to Bren...”oh f**k, shouldn’t have done that”...to their three onrushing forwards. Brendan got trampled in the ensuing stampede and left Nunu the whippet to race onto the free ball and rifle in a shot from just inside the area.
The disappointment was palpable, but we kept on going. Our most enterprising and incisive move followed soon after. Debbie glided unnoticed into the box to meet a neatly chipped cross just in front of goal. It was a header of sheer force, no glancing side-trick here, just a full-blooded, forehead ringing smacker! The crowd roared yet within an instant there was hush as everyone waited for the outcome of this attempt with all the anticipation of a midwife with no hands. Debbie wheeled round in celebratory fashion, only to wheel back to confirm that what he had seen in the corner of his eye was indeed their keeper making a reaction save at point blank range. The guy must have been a traffic officer in the past to have got his hand up that quickly, and thus we were thwarted once again.
Even the attentions of the usually lively Gavin and further pressure from our midfielders and front-runners proved fruitless. We just couldn’t score despite getting close in to their area quite frequently. They didn’t seem to have this kind of difficulty, putting in two more in the closing stages from the left hand side.
5-0. Well, 3-0 really plus a little help from us!
Back to the Station Hotel bar and dining room for a well earned rest. Our centre backs as usual resorted to the tried and trusted method of honing their physiques and reactions next week with four pints of IPA.
Worryingly though, Sir Ron confirmed that at some point he may be relocating to Wales, eventually. Some say its a lack of consistency in the results, others the difficulty with the language barrier but I think its all about Sir Ron and Lady Crennel getting back to Gods country to eat grass and smoke lamb! Or was it the other way round? Tootle pip!
Goodbye Sir Ronald
Quack quack
Tuesday 23 November 2010
Monday 15 November 2010
Knobs 2 MBDA 5
A close first half 2-2, then subsidence when we kicked downhill. It could have ended up a thrashing. Perhaps it was.
One or two thoughts.
It's not easy at Vets level to compete in a straightforward way to win. Everyone tries but the problem always is, and will be, the compulsory use of subs- albeit roll on and off or whatever. The first eleven to start is not always the best competetive team. Everyone would have different views on that anyway before we even embark on tactics and individual expectations. Sometimes the use of subs comes off and we win or draw and sometimes it doesn't and we lose. Yesterday it didn't. When it doesn't seem to be working, matters can slip from bad to worse. Heads go down, little cabals develop on the field, individuals start doing what individuals do best following their own individual agendas. So we lost. So was it enjoyable, well probably, cos it was a flowing, aggro free game
despite the second half struggle and the result. And despite the newly found argumentative streak from Monsieur Boyle - he's been watching too much of the Under 7's.
I firmly believe if we had proceeded in the second half with the team set up and personnel we started the game with we would have won. But as mentioned above and on previous occasions we are always in danger of jettisoning any impetus, shape and flow of a performance by using subs compulsorily. Doesn't even matter really who has to come on, more often than not the performance is often adversely affected. And I thought it was yesterday. This is no criticism merely an observation of the reality of our set up.
We took the lead with a lovely, brave opportunist header from John Boyle from a long cross to the far post by Chris Wilson. We were warned they had some good footballers, some youth, and some know how and they equalised when a swerving shot was well parried by Trevor only to find noone anticipating from our side, resulting in a smash in at second attempt.
Our lead was restored by Andy set free by....? and banged in unopposed.
Their equaliser might have been fortuitous in that the ball was smashed against their midfielder Chris Smith pointblank, who ran onto the ball and scored top corner from 20 yards. Picture finish. Handball? I didn't think so. Certainly no intent to handle if it indeed did hit his hands (which I couldn't see) and anyway he hardly controlled it! Certainly controlled the shot mind!
Gavin came off shortly before half time, to be replaced by Tony of locked in the lavatory fame, returning from injury. John Boyle having had a blinder first half, nowhere more than in the effort department was substituted for Martin who replaced Chris W, positionally, the latter moving to left midfield and half an hour's isolation. See it was all a little difficult. Ten minutes into the second half, by which time we were trailing by 2, Tony of locked in the lavatory fame was taken off for presumably an early bath/shite or what. Don't worry Tony "you're my favourite" and by the way Alistair doesn't do Christmas cards so don't worry.
We were rather open defensively , second half, and they punished us. But hey they played well and it wasn't all down to our own frailties. Helluva good goal by the tubular winger- don't often concede one like that! All shimmy and footwork then a clever placed finish, Trevor couldn't have spotted through the crowd.
One criticism second half. We don't have a great header of the ball up front and each of Trevor's booming clearances, from hand, were comfortably headed clear by the centre half, in a flawless display of unchallenged heading as each one came unerringly and centrally onto his head.. Trev's boomers should have gone wide, see if the centre half liked running 30 yards left or right to head clear, or we should have been content to persevere by building up from the back through the middle. Our strengths????? No togetherness in sorting that out on the pitch. How do we want to play, what do we think our strengths are- these are things that should occupy our thoughts no matter who the personnel on the park are.
Second half it has to be said our attacking players were well shackled.
A few in the pub. Home in the rain. Decided lack of enthusiasm being shown for Blunham game next week- lots of injuries and non availability. It's at home!
Toodle pip
One or two thoughts.
It's not easy at Vets level to compete in a straightforward way to win. Everyone tries but the problem always is, and will be, the compulsory use of subs- albeit roll on and off or whatever. The first eleven to start is not always the best competetive team. Everyone would have different views on that anyway before we even embark on tactics and individual expectations. Sometimes the use of subs comes off and we win or draw and sometimes it doesn't and we lose. Yesterday it didn't. When it doesn't seem to be working, matters can slip from bad to worse. Heads go down, little cabals develop on the field, individuals start doing what individuals do best following their own individual agendas. So we lost. So was it enjoyable, well probably, cos it was a flowing, aggro free game
despite the second half struggle and the result. And despite the newly found argumentative streak from Monsieur Boyle - he's been watching too much of the Under 7's.
I firmly believe if we had proceeded in the second half with the team set up and personnel we started the game with we would have won. But as mentioned above and on previous occasions we are always in danger of jettisoning any impetus, shape and flow of a performance by using subs compulsorily. Doesn't even matter really who has to come on, more often than not the performance is often adversely affected. And I thought it was yesterday. This is no criticism merely an observation of the reality of our set up.
We took the lead with a lovely, brave opportunist header from John Boyle from a long cross to the far post by Chris Wilson. We were warned they had some good footballers, some youth, and some know how and they equalised when a swerving shot was well parried by Trevor only to find noone anticipating from our side, resulting in a smash in at second attempt.
Our lead was restored by Andy set free by....? and banged in unopposed.
Their equaliser might have been fortuitous in that the ball was smashed against their midfielder Chris Smith pointblank, who ran onto the ball and scored top corner from 20 yards. Picture finish. Handball? I didn't think so. Certainly no intent to handle if it indeed did hit his hands (which I couldn't see) and anyway he hardly controlled it! Certainly controlled the shot mind!
Gavin came off shortly before half time, to be replaced by Tony of locked in the lavatory fame, returning from injury. John Boyle having had a blinder first half, nowhere more than in the effort department was substituted for Martin who replaced Chris W, positionally, the latter moving to left midfield and half an hour's isolation. See it was all a little difficult. Ten minutes into the second half, by which time we were trailing by 2, Tony of locked in the lavatory fame was taken off for presumably an early bath/shite or what. Don't worry Tony "you're my favourite" and by the way Alistair doesn't do Christmas cards so don't worry.
We were rather open defensively , second half, and they punished us. But hey they played well and it wasn't all down to our own frailties. Helluva good goal by the tubular winger- don't often concede one like that! All shimmy and footwork then a clever placed finish, Trevor couldn't have spotted through the crowd.
One criticism second half. We don't have a great header of the ball up front and each of Trevor's booming clearances, from hand, were comfortably headed clear by the centre half, in a flawless display of unchallenged heading as each one came unerringly and centrally onto his head.. Trev's boomers should have gone wide, see if the centre half liked running 30 yards left or right to head clear, or we should have been content to persevere by building up from the back through the middle. Our strengths????? No togetherness in sorting that out on the pitch. How do we want to play, what do we think our strengths are- these are things that should occupy our thoughts no matter who the personnel on the park are.
Second half it has to be said our attacking players were well shackled.
A few in the pub. Home in the rain. Decided lack of enthusiasm being shown for Blunham game next week- lots of injuries and non availability. It's at home!
Toodle pip
Monday 8 November 2010
Old Minchendenians 2 Knobs 2
A good game. A fair result? Well I'm biassed I thought we should have won- comfortably. The lads weren't too happy with their linesman and not only for the goal he managed to get disallowed in the first half, rifled in by John Twigg from a Chris C pass. Chris allegedly handled!
In fairness they finished the stronger and perhaps our profligacy in finishing might show we were a tad lucky in the end.
Darren A had a fine game in midfield in the Bully supporting position and the back four were solid throughout the first half.
0-0 at half time and the innovation of oranges. Brendan of the fucked knee replaced Twiggy. Gouty Gavin went up front and on we went. A lovely little passage of play of John to Chris who cutely turned it round the corner for Gavin to finish decisively. 1-0. They equalised from an uncontested move from the right.
Paul was galloping freely when he was shot from behind and Twiggy immediately replaced him. It was a ping in the calf followed by tears and retching. The first aid kit, introduced this morning went unused, God knows what all those little packages are for, a heroin stash probably. Alistair diagnosed a mere strain, no sympathy from these medics.
They shortly afterwards took the lead when people stopped for a throw, not given, and the big lad outpaced Chris, who was stuck in the mud, to slip home.
Straight from the kick off Bully lofted left to Gavin who hurtling forwards shot accurately from 25 yards. 2-2.
We missed a few. Names of culprits? Am nae si cruel.
Gavin I thought was assaulted and battered to the ground for a penalty which was not given. I would have given it, of course I would.
Nevertheless well done the young ref, gets a wee bit too much intimidation I believe, but he stayed the course.
I remained on the line, flagless, but was rewarded with a win on the dominoe card, second week running.
Oh aye and Newcastle hammered Arsenal 1-0 at the Emirates.
In fairness they finished the stronger and perhaps our profligacy in finishing might show we were a tad lucky in the end.
Darren A had a fine game in midfield in the Bully supporting position and the back four were solid throughout the first half.
0-0 at half time and the innovation of oranges. Brendan of the fucked knee replaced Twiggy. Gouty Gavin went up front and on we went. A lovely little passage of play of John to Chris who cutely turned it round the corner for Gavin to finish decisively. 1-0. They equalised from an uncontested move from the right.
Paul was galloping freely when he was shot from behind and Twiggy immediately replaced him. It was a ping in the calf followed by tears and retching. The first aid kit, introduced this morning went unused, God knows what all those little packages are for, a heroin stash probably. Alistair diagnosed a mere strain, no sympathy from these medics.
They shortly afterwards took the lead when people stopped for a throw, not given, and the big lad outpaced Chris, who was stuck in the mud, to slip home.
Straight from the kick off Bully lofted left to Gavin who hurtling forwards shot accurately from 25 yards. 2-2.
We missed a few. Names of culprits? Am nae si cruel.
Gavin I thought was assaulted and battered to the ground for a penalty which was not given. I would have given it, of course I would.
Nevertheless well done the young ref, gets a wee bit too much intimidation I believe, but he stayed the course.
I remained on the line, flagless, but was rewarded with a win on the dominoe card, second week running.
Oh aye and Newcastle hammered Arsenal 1-0 at the Emirates.
Monday 1 November 2010
Knobs 2 Ware 2
Highly competitive, hard fought game with little aggro! An I was referee. Am staggered.
We're playing radically changed teams now on a weekly basis as the sort of vet available for selection each week becomes an endangered species- and we haven't even hit Christmas or Mothering Sunday yet!
Well done all participants yesterday, all played well some exceptionally well. Some of our football was quite pacy and imaginative, Martin was back. The happiest side would have been Ware who were dependent on guts and endeavour. With our approach play and chances we have to be a little disappointed to drop two points. Mind hey, it was a true Vets' match no need for the promise of 'his birth certificate's in the post' on this occasion.
The pitch was slick and greasy and a soft rain fell throughout the proceedings.
Totally against the run of play they took the lead from a route one move. Hoof from goalie, bouncing into our area where the wee black guy got the telling toe in and sent it wide of Mark. We equalised before half time from a nice move which led to Andy lashing in.
Second half much like the first, with us on top providing the footballing moves and them defending stoutly, notably their agile keeper. Even he could not deny puff puff Dave as he snuck in late to head a Bully corner emphatically home. You see, no "puff puff" when he's being sneaky.
Gerry was on playing instead of the injured Tony and with 15 minutes to go- or something like that, the stopwatch stopped twice , it refuses to work beyond 30 mutes 53 seconds, Chris had to go off injured and we played the last part of the game with 10. They came into it doggedly yet hardly looked dangerous until him with the towering, shiny pate guided a dropping ball up and over our defence into the top corner for two all. We might have won at the death when Andy made a scintillating run only to see his angled drive tipped past the post by their outstanding keeper.
Dave played well, he's got the makings of a good vet. Fran Cottontraders corsets two for the price of one.
Us and Ware in the Station, no other customers and no food. Whaes like us?
Whae has a pub like us? Twere like a morgue.
Next week away at OK Corral, bring your hardware.
We're playing radically changed teams now on a weekly basis as the sort of vet available for selection each week becomes an endangered species- and we haven't even hit Christmas or Mothering Sunday yet!
Well done all participants yesterday, all played well some exceptionally well. Some of our football was quite pacy and imaginative, Martin was back. The happiest side would have been Ware who were dependent on guts and endeavour. With our approach play and chances we have to be a little disappointed to drop two points. Mind hey, it was a true Vets' match no need for the promise of 'his birth certificate's in the post' on this occasion.
The pitch was slick and greasy and a soft rain fell throughout the proceedings.
Totally against the run of play they took the lead from a route one move. Hoof from goalie, bouncing into our area where the wee black guy got the telling toe in and sent it wide of Mark. We equalised before half time from a nice move which led to Andy lashing in.
Second half much like the first, with us on top providing the footballing moves and them defending stoutly, notably their agile keeper. Even he could not deny puff puff Dave as he snuck in late to head a Bully corner emphatically home. You see, no "puff puff" when he's being sneaky.
Gerry was on playing instead of the injured Tony and with 15 minutes to go- or something like that, the stopwatch stopped twice , it refuses to work beyond 30 mutes 53 seconds, Chris had to go off injured and we played the last part of the game with 10. They came into it doggedly yet hardly looked dangerous until him with the towering, shiny pate guided a dropping ball up and over our defence into the top corner for two all. We might have won at the death when Andy made a scintillating run only to see his angled drive tipped past the post by their outstanding keeper.
Dave played well, he's got the makings of a good vet. Fran Cottontraders corsets two for the price of one.
Us and Ware in the Station, no other customers and no food. Whaes like us?
Whae has a pub like us? Twere like a morgue.
Next week away at OK Corral, bring your hardware.
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