Shortest match report ever to match lowest comments ever, last week. I'm rushing off north but before I do well done to the chaps today , an excellent performance (perhaps we ought to have scored more ) and no there's nothing wrong with my eyesight. I've had a good few chuckles in reminiscing about the game- despair at the condition of some Homo not very sapiens, the planet must have better options as custodians otherwise wiv nae fookin chance!
Incredible!
Woody notched another couple, did you see the pullback on him, incredible. Why didn't yiz aal moan an caal the perpetrator a fookin cunt. Both nice and tidy and paying dividends for speed of thought and foot.
Steve scored a lovely placed shot at the end of an exciting move and John Boyle latching onto a loose ball thrashed home a smashing first timer. Incredible.
Chris Wilson and James were simple towers at the back reining in the young bustler with aplomb. Class!
Alistair and Twiggy , superb full back displays and always helped in going forwards- Alistair long diagonal centre to Woody found him wanting for once and a Twiggy advance and cross to far post inexplicably headed wide by the towering Vinnie. Incredible.
Excellent wide play from Nick and Mr Boyle as industrious in helping out defensively as they were imaginative going forward. John looked very sprightly or was it a touch of whippets and carthorses? Was he saying here bonny lad hev a carrot then nipping past- a really enjoyed watching.
Nick soldiered on injured until giving way 5 minutes to go . Well done.
Darren in the middle was everywhere, intercepting loads and tackling successfully on many occasions. He didn't show at the pub, presumably went home for some form of transplant.
You were individually and as a team simply to good for them. Perhaps you were concentrating on the purpose of the game better than them. They seemed to be more concerned with haranguing the poor old.............. Incredible!
Tony had very little to do- one blinding save, tipped over but he was very active in the encouragement and distribution departments. Vital.
Am away north noo so hev a nice week bonny lads and yiz soon.
Mr Magoo.
Goodbye Sir Ronald
Quack quack
Sunday 29 September 2013
Monday 23 September 2013
Old Owens 4 Knobs 3
Flat, slick pitch , lovely grass, dew covered and a competitive, trouble free game.
We defended well and in numbers, we had to because they were playing some inventive, on the deck football. Despite our getting stuck in they were still able to breach us on several occasions first half when without the courage and sheer speed of reactions of keeper Tony they would have been out of sight by the break. As it was they briefly led from a comical, pinball routine that drifted over the line. But after a Vinnie drive crashed the bar we equalised through Woody, a busy, bustling presence up front. He looked a tad offside but a good referee played on and he rounded their keeper before netting under pressure. 1-1 half time.
They were still purring forward and looked dangerous at all times, yet resolute defence in numbers saw us holding our own until they took the lead from an exquisite, individual goal clipped in from an angle. There followed a penalty from which they scored, after Chris W wiped out their man in a penalty area which seemed marked out to cover half the pitch! Minutes later their chance to make it 4 was postponed when a subtle barge in the back by John prevented their bloke heading in. The subsequent penalty, same player, same place made it 4.
A fight back ensued. Woody chested down a ball on half way and burst clear, again rounding their giant keeper to repeat his first. A Vinnie bicycle kick was blocked and he volleyed the rebound home from a prone position. 4-3. Perhaps we should all emulate the Vinnie style we could be world champs at playing from the flat on the back position.
We looked more threatening for the last 10 minutes but the reward for effort was nothing.
They were a good side and we contained them pretty well but the downside was that we could not summon the extra energy to get forward and support the forwards Woody and Vinnie who were always too isolated and reliant on their own individual efforts. Get fitter chaps, this is the Premier League. Cough, splutter!
We defended well and in numbers, we had to because they were playing some inventive, on the deck football. Despite our getting stuck in they were still able to breach us on several occasions first half when without the courage and sheer speed of reactions of keeper Tony they would have been out of sight by the break. As it was they briefly led from a comical, pinball routine that drifted over the line. But after a Vinnie drive crashed the bar we equalised through Woody, a busy, bustling presence up front. He looked a tad offside but a good referee played on and he rounded their keeper before netting under pressure. 1-1 half time.
They were still purring forward and looked dangerous at all times, yet resolute defence in numbers saw us holding our own until they took the lead from an exquisite, individual goal clipped in from an angle. There followed a penalty from which they scored, after Chris W wiped out their man in a penalty area which seemed marked out to cover half the pitch! Minutes later their chance to make it 4 was postponed when a subtle barge in the back by John prevented their bloke heading in. The subsequent penalty, same player, same place made it 4.
A fight back ensued. Woody chested down a ball on half way and burst clear, again rounding their giant keeper to repeat his first. A Vinnie bicycle kick was blocked and he volleyed the rebound home from a prone position. 4-3. Perhaps we should all emulate the Vinnie style we could be world champs at playing from the flat on the back position.
We looked more threatening for the last 10 minutes but the reward for effort was nothing.
They were a good side and we contained them pretty well but the downside was that we could not summon the extra energy to get forward and support the forwards Woody and Vinnie who were always too isolated and reliant on their own individual efforts. Get fitter chaps, this is the Premier League. Cough, splutter!
Monday 16 September 2013
Knobs 2 Saints 0
Saints turned up at their pitch, we turned up at ours! They were wrong, we were right so a home league win, clean sheet for Coco with his new gloves and 3 points to the Knobs.
Homebeads man of the match?
Homebeads man of the match?
Monday 9 September 2013
Buntingford "big ears" 2 Knobs 1
The game that nearly never was.
By Friday lunchtime we were desperately short of numbers and temporary manager Dave decided to call the game off. However, after a short enquiry by club officials it turned out that Dave's texts reached fewer people than he had hoped and we in fact had plenty of players after all.
Not only did we have enough, we had 4 new players. This gave Dave an insight into what it is like being AVB and suddenly having to fit lots of new players into an existing team and making the gel quickly.
This was not just a challenge for Dave but also the team. It's easy remembering the name of 1 new player, but 4 is tricky, especially when 2 of them are tall and look similar. To prove this point, Joel asked after the game which one was Stuart! This may also explain why there was a lack of calling throughout the game.
To add to the confusion for the season, we now have 2 Tonys, 2 Alastairs, 2 Martins, 2 Brendans, 2 Darrens, 2 Johns and 2 Seans.
There was an enthusiastic mood at the station car park pre match until the chairman decided to demand £20 from everyone and a completed form before we left for the game. Admin completed and mood sobered, we set off only 15 minutes late.
There was disappointment at the sight of the old black kit arriving on a surprisingly hot and sunny morning. This was quickly forgotten though as volunteer Goalkeeper for the season, Tony realised that he had forgotten to purchase his new Goalie gloves from Sports Direct. After a few practice saves and cries of pain with his bare hands he managed to find a pair of black rubber gloves in someones car boot. Fortunately he didn't have too much to do apart from sweat into them.
We lined up in our successful 4-5-1 formation, with Richard given the tough task of playing up top on his own. Both Brendans started, one at left back and one in midfield. Big James slotted in along side Tony K.
The knobs started very strongly and dominated possession creating lots of half chances and breaks in behind the oppos defence. We earned a number of early corners, one of which cost us the opening goal. Although we were the better team technically we were not in terms of fitness. Buntingford cleared our corner and broke quickly with numbers. Having a spare man in the break allowed them to get a shot away which looked to be going wide before Alastair diverted the ball into our goal past the rubber gloved Tony.
The Knobs kept battling though and shortly after we won another free kick in the oppos half. A reluctant James was ordered forward and a beauty of a free kick curled in by Bully was nodded straight in the new man. James won many headers in this game and we look to have found an alternative to Vinny's head at corners and free kicks.
Dave then brought on new boys Martyn and Rob for their debuts to take a look at too, slotting them into the middle with Bully. As Spurs found against the Woolwich wanderers last week, you can be the best team, dominate possession, chances and corners but when trying to incorporate new players you can get caught out. And so it proved with us as an unmarked runner through the middle got on the end of a cross to nod home uncontested.
That was the end of the goals for the game. A few more player and positional changes in the 2nd half, but our lack of fitness limited our chances and meant a more even share of the ball. Tony only had a couple of things to deal with in goal including a suspected broken rib and broken hand from punching the pitch, there keeper probably dozed off from boredom.
Other things of note were Joel taking the John Boyle role of squaring up to one of the opposition and Tony K getting an early entry into this season's "opposition player put down of the year award" with the classic "shut up, big ears!"
Nearly all of us headed for the clubhouse for sausages, French sticks and chips, looking forward to the game next week at home to Saints. There was speculation that the squad would be enhanced by our "only play at home" players and Ron would also be back at the helm.
Ps. Bully has a great deal for you on a new pair of adidas boots. Whatever size feet you are, they will fit you, honest. Please see bully for details.
By Friday lunchtime we were desperately short of numbers and temporary manager Dave decided to call the game off. However, after a short enquiry by club officials it turned out that Dave's texts reached fewer people than he had hoped and we in fact had plenty of players after all.
Not only did we have enough, we had 4 new players. This gave Dave an insight into what it is like being AVB and suddenly having to fit lots of new players into an existing team and making the gel quickly.
This was not just a challenge for Dave but also the team. It's easy remembering the name of 1 new player, but 4 is tricky, especially when 2 of them are tall and look similar. To prove this point, Joel asked after the game which one was Stuart! This may also explain why there was a lack of calling throughout the game.
To add to the confusion for the season, we now have 2 Tonys, 2 Alastairs, 2 Martins, 2 Brendans, 2 Darrens, 2 Johns and 2 Seans.
There was an enthusiastic mood at the station car park pre match until the chairman decided to demand £20 from everyone and a completed form before we left for the game. Admin completed and mood sobered, we set off only 15 minutes late.
There was disappointment at the sight of the old black kit arriving on a surprisingly hot and sunny morning. This was quickly forgotten though as volunteer Goalkeeper for the season, Tony realised that he had forgotten to purchase his new Goalie gloves from Sports Direct. After a few practice saves and cries of pain with his bare hands he managed to find a pair of black rubber gloves in someones car boot. Fortunately he didn't have too much to do apart from sweat into them.
We lined up in our successful 4-5-1 formation, with Richard given the tough task of playing up top on his own. Both Brendans started, one at left back and one in midfield. Big James slotted in along side Tony K.
The knobs started very strongly and dominated possession creating lots of half chances and breaks in behind the oppos defence. We earned a number of early corners, one of which cost us the opening goal. Although we were the better team technically we were not in terms of fitness. Buntingford cleared our corner and broke quickly with numbers. Having a spare man in the break allowed them to get a shot away which looked to be going wide before Alastair diverted the ball into our goal past the rubber gloved Tony.
The Knobs kept battling though and shortly after we won another free kick in the oppos half. A reluctant James was ordered forward and a beauty of a free kick curled in by Bully was nodded straight in the new man. James won many headers in this game and we look to have found an alternative to Vinny's head at corners and free kicks.
Dave then brought on new boys Martyn and Rob for their debuts to take a look at too, slotting them into the middle with Bully. As Spurs found against the Woolwich wanderers last week, you can be the best team, dominate possession, chances and corners but when trying to incorporate new players you can get caught out. And so it proved with us as an unmarked runner through the middle got on the end of a cross to nod home uncontested.
That was the end of the goals for the game. A few more player and positional changes in the 2nd half, but our lack of fitness limited our chances and meant a more even share of the ball. Tony only had a couple of things to deal with in goal including a suspected broken rib and broken hand from punching the pitch, there keeper probably dozed off from boredom.
Other things of note were Joel taking the John Boyle role of squaring up to one of the opposition and Tony K getting an early entry into this season's "opposition player put down of the year award" with the classic "shut up, big ears!"
Nearly all of us headed for the clubhouse for sausages, French sticks and chips, looking forward to the game next week at home to Saints. There was speculation that the squad would be enhanced by our "only play at home" players and Ron would also be back at the helm.
Ps. Bully has a great deal for you on a new pair of adidas boots. Whatever size feet you are, they will fit you, honest. Please see bully for details.
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