Therfield 0 Knobs 2 - report by Dandy Dave

It was an exceptionally warm October morning in the idyllic village of Therfield where a master class of near total football was about to be played. We had a couple of new faces and a stand in goal keeper to make up the numbers as there were holidays galore being spent around the country, across Europe and further afield. Chris G was spending a few days in Sidmouth with Mrs G. Brendan was on the look out for a new disease in the Far East whilst Kenny and Bully and a few friends were sticking their fingers in soft tissue for 50 Euros a time. I heard that some of them were getting brown nosed as well!!
Anyway we had our Icelandic International Runar back in the team. Vinny popped along with a more than adequate goalie Stuart AKA Big Steve and a big thank you to Triathlon Trevor who mustered the energy after finishing a 20k swim,run and ride the previous day. Before we got on the pitch we opened the kit bag which was washed by Paul Crosby and i have to say i have never smelt a more revolting smell since i was on a veg diet last year. We came to the conclusion that Paul had let his Labrador Bill piss all over the the kit on Monday and let it fester for the remaining days so we could get the full force of it. I even tried to use my Ralgex to over come such a dreadful whiff. The kit must always be conditioned with a suitable fabric conditioner i use comfort Strawberry and Lily Kiss i highly recommend it.
As the game kicked off i new from the start that the tactics used were the right ones. I went for the same as last week with 5 in the middle. Bully was sitting between defence and midfield and was influential assisting in both goals. He gelled well with Darren H and Alistair AKA Angus! Which i have now changed to Agnus. Who would have thought it Bully,Darren H and Agnus all working for the cause. Things are looking up for sure. We were on the front foot from the start and did not give them a seconds rest while we were playing attractive football with some great one touch passing and moving into space when needed. Chris Cox was once again running tirelessly whilst Mr Boyle was again running up and down the right like a hare. 20 minutes in Vinny came on for me and showed great composure whilst on the ball linking well with Bully and Chris C. We had the opposition running ragged and it payed dividends on 35 minutes from a weak throw the ball landed at Bully's feet and in a blink of an eye he swept the ball out to the left (out side of boot) where Runar found himself running towards their right back. He dropped a shoulder jinked in side and curled a perfect shot in the top right corner of the goal. It was the least we deserved. We had one kicked off the line although some say it was over and a goal mouth scramble which should have ended up with Darren A getting his first for the season. John Boyle was having his usual spat with the referees assistant who should have been still on his paper round. We go in 1 nil at half time with a positive buzz in the camp.
There wasn't much to say at half time apart from keep it up and do the same again. They made a few changes in the second half with Fat lad who plays centre back usually up front and slotting one extra in the middle. They applied alot of pressure for 15/20 minutes and we weathered the storm quite well still playing to feet where possible and playing ourselves out of trouble with ease. Big Steve made a fantastic one on one save and just to add he has a drop kick which can bring down an aeroplane. Im sure the first one he done is still on the way to Royston. I think they gave up with 15 to go Runar went off with a twisted ankle as there were alot of pot holes on the pitch. Vinny came back on in the middle i went left mid and connected well with Young Bill who had another solid performance, your not finished! I can see you having at least 10 starts this season.
We finished the game as we started on the attack for the majority of the play. Bully had a 45 yard shot (he suggested 45 id say more 35) which was saved by the keeper who had a busy morning. Then finally with 3 minutes to go Bully played a beautiful pass out to John who turned the defender inside out and cracked a close ranger in to the roof of the net.They were lucky they only lost by 2 it would have been more if it wasn't for Triathlon Trevor. For his kindly donated £500 for the new kit he was allowed to do whatever he wanted and he did. He just didn't do what was expected of him and score. His Mike Lisle Esq performance will go down in KNOBS history as one of the best non scoring forwards performance.
Only 7 in the pub Vinny was whisked off by the wife who made up the capacity crowd of 13. Next AGM no wives at the game on the agenda please. In summing up there is now fierce competition for centre back as Darren H and Agnus both had a sterling game. Runar may be filling the left midfield slot and Vinny is definitely one that could get better and better. Hopefully big Steve may fancy another run out he's the only one who fits the shirt.

Love, Dandy