Knobs 11 Garston 2

I refereed, in the first half and I was embarrassed. Martin agreed in the first half, this was embarrassing. Approaching John coming off at half time, his first comment was "this is embarrassing". So it wasn't just me. What was so embarrassing? Our 5-0 half time lead?
Perhaps some of us were getting things out of all proportion, perhaps we were playing so bloody well perhaps it was simply an unstoppable day for us. Who the fuck knows. In the pub Brendan said you can only approach a game against the opposition set out in front of you. Yes. It's no good beating yourself up because you outplayed an opposition so thoroughly in the only indisputable way- simply scoring far more goals than them!
However nagging disquiet rules in my addled brain. When arranging the fixtures their bloke John always emphasises the age of his side put out against us. (Garston have a very large vets set up and for some recent historical reason have chosen us as a fixture for their mainly over 50's side). I always retort that we are a small vets' squad and can only field an eleven that is available. I emphasised that to John last Sunday and he seemed to be OK with it. Last year we beat them 2-1 with not so much an older Knobs side but a less able one. You may remember I scored the winner, I do, it was a good win, an enjoyable game for both sides and one we actually won with a faultless display of goalkeeping by Trevor. Today was different. Apart from playing with our legs in hobbling irons I don't know what else we could have done.
They chose to kick off after winning the toss and we chose to kick downhill. They started brightly with some of their clever passing drawing gasps of admiration. Yet their purist football never looked remotely like advancing them into dangerous positions where they could damage us. It's a big pitch and they didn't have the legs to support each other in possession. C'est la vie! After a few pleasing-on-the-eye passes their moves either broke down with a loose pass or more often they were brushed aside by honest endeavour. Thence came the crunch. When in possession Knebworth possessed players who could run strongly with the ball and off the ball, Richard, the returning Alistair, Matty and Martin to mention a few were running like whippets. As we got on top we tended to run even harder and faster. What a contrast to the last two weeks when we looked decidedly unfit and off the pace. Of course the confidence of scoring made all the difference and we fed hungrily thereafter, racking up goals at will. Mind you we've all played games when we had a superiority and won but never so emphatically as this one. I remember a game two years ago against a very weak Old Pretenders which we only drew 2-2 instead of winning by a cricket score. Then there was the game we lost at home to a pretty aged Kempston side last season, how did that happen? And so on. Perhaps as their midfielder Wally and some of our team said some of their side simply gave up. Perhaps, I'm not sure. Anyway relative to the game today, those who played for us were certainly up for it and well played to them all. At least we paid them the respect of playing hard and not showboating or taking the piss just cos we were scoring so well. That would have been awful. We played hard and respectfully so well done all of you!
They won't all be like this one. Next week we entertain Ware at home in the league, a different world but please bring the same commitment and attitude with you.
Goalscorers Matt 4, Mike 3, Steve, Mark, Brendan and Ron (my kingdom for a chip! it brought memories back from twenty years ago and before and a tear blinded me eye).
A nice wee session in The Fox where Garston showed in numbers. I guess the next game against them, before Christmas, might see a different opposition in front of us. Fair enough, but we'll have Roy back. Revenge is a dish savoured....... Put this one in your diaries.

Thanks to Alistair for reffing second half. Thanks to John for not coming on in the second half. Thanks to Roy for going home before kick off, superfluity of players.
A viewing of the new kit took place in The Fox, the jury's out! Thanks to Trevor for providing it and best wishes to him in light of his family concern.
Obviously those who ref our games in future cannot wear black. Some of you may know that I have a rather attractive line in white T-shirts with dizzying designs which are borrowable at no charge! And I didn't get them from that Mike Ashley's sporting junk shops.
The incomparable Len Shackleton, Crown Prince of Soccer, once had a chapter in his autobiography entitled what directors know about football. Needless to say there followed several blank pages. This was followed by Cloughie's mantra- directors know nothing about football, directors never thank you and directors are essentially untrustworthy so don't try to befriend them. KK should have taken note. We have owners and international companies now running clubs. Thieving Russian oligarchs with their playthings, corrupt Thai politicians with apalling human rights records, billionaire Arab sheiks accidentally sitting on oilfields (wonder if Manchester City have a women's team, ad pay good money to watch a team playing in burkas but not sure about the stoning and amputations that follow a stripping off of a veil when they score) and then there's the heroic 'people's owner' Mike Fucking Ashley. The man who made his millions selling shoddy sportswear, made by slave and child labour to the masses, some may say the multitudinous unwashed, of Britain. Isn't it great to support a club with such financial scruples? He's given Newcastle nowt, he'll make a huge profit on his investment and life will go on. Just how does one ethically support your club in this day and age? Fucked if a knaa. The new messiahs of Newcastle? Some conglomerate of Indian businessmen. Better than Ashley? You must be joking though Geordies do like a curry! The pain goes on.... and on....

So it's howay the lads as England's national team slips further into the brown slimy stuff . What a way to run a pastime.

Chippy

Knobs 1 Royston 5

Divvint despair emm- I think Trevor's back next week. What else can one say.
We tended to be a side of disparate parts and not very well oiled parts at that. Except perhaps when we're in The Fox.
Thanks to those who stand in as keepers but for two games now we've given the oppo goals. Not to say we deserved anything from either game but the keeper position has been a mitigating factor. Still onward and upward. Steve Bull scored from the penalty spot and is now top scorer infinitesimally.
Matt got a lumpy eye from an errant elbow, JB and Steve persevered with last week's rib injuries, Dave was back from his holidays and was all over the pitch and and and......
I'm off to Newcastle for the week so not much else to report.
Thanks to Phil for reffing.
And isn't that Carlo A FUCKIN TOSSPOT. you heard it here first.

The comeback kid- in a minute.

August 24th Knobs 1 Walkern 4

No need to despair sae divvint ye fret me canny lads a thort yiz wornt si bad actually, ones each in thi second half when yiz gorra proper goalie like!
Walkern are always a competitive side, the've all played before. Last season we beat them twice and they beat us once 1-0. They got the rub of the green on Sunday, they did ping the ball around with some zest and their crosses from set pieces and open play were always in the right areas. Fair enough. I'm not saying they couldn't have scored on other occasions but the 4 goals they managed were serious individual errors. First one, how noone even went near the incoming player who had a free half volley on an open goal, I can't quite fathom. The next one I can cos I was at the heart of the action and a faint heart it was- goalie meanders leisurely toward through ball, committed forward gets there first and it's 2-0. Pathetic! The third was a poor pass out of defence, which was cut out in a central position by their bloke who audaciously strode forward and chipped the keeper with ease. Three feet and rising! Fuck me that's three. Yet I had thought we'd had some interesting moves in the course of the half. Any criticism would be that though they were probably suffering as much as us in this first game they were prepared to suffer that little bit more. We tended not to push out when we got possession, work done we think and we walk out. That's not good enough. When Chris was shouting "move out" I'm sure people could hear but weren't heeding. Pushing out and upfield is not a rest period it's an integral part of keeping a relevant, compact shape. Let's improve on this next weekend.
Second half much better. An excellent goal starting with Bill, in the left full back position, saw the ball quickly and accurately transferred to the right where John O'Boyle or John O' Me fuckinchestsknackered Boyle was having increasing joy (he was robbed of a goal in the first half). The said ball, for it was it, cutely arrived to Monsieur Bull who scored with aplomb. We conceded a 4th which was interesting and bizarre from my angle (John Twigg had gone into goal by the way) I was now watching and playing with a pretty little flag. Martin got injured, broken toe I reckon and the match faded away on a not so Elysian field.
I went off to deal with Ernie and Brenda and I've subsequently had a complaint about unlocked doors and gates and dirty corridors so something must be arranged to avoid our being tipped the black spot from the council.
Most of us toddled up to the cricket club for a couple afterwards together with the opposition. Very nice. Absentees Martin, broken toe, and Mark, why I know not!

Next week home to Royston with Garston at home the week after. Garston have made their usual request.

Ron 'I'll never don the gloves again' not Springett

Presentation Evening

A successful evening at Ye Venerable Foxe attended by a good few regular players- apologies from Richard and Steve H, where were the others?

Noone disgraced themselves, well there was a bit of swearing but precious little headbutting, mud throwing or spitting.

Matt won a trophy for top goalscorer.
Roy won the trophy for Players' player of the Year.
Steve Bull won the trophy for Manager's Player of the Year.

Gavin had made three mugs, etched. One went to Steve Bull for most appearances in the season- an ever present! One went to John Boyle for his high output of administrative work and one went to Ron, as a spitton I believe.
Ron also received a T shirt with some gobbing references on it, he'll pass it on to next season's disgraceful activist.

Training will resume at the Rec in very near future.
Thank you and well done all.

Ron

Season Stats

We played a total of 32 games this season, winning 21, drawing 3 and losing 8. We scored a total of 91 goals and conceded 56.

Players who made 10 appearances or more (including coming on as sub) were as follows:

32 – Steve Bull
29 – Matt Peacock
25 – Brendan Wren
24 – John Boyle
24 – Roy Oakley
22 – Phil Wells
21 – Chris Griffiths
20 – Ron Crennell
20 – Trevor Hyatt
20 – Chris Wilson
19 - Dave Jordan
19 – Gavin Simpson
17 – Martin Byron-Grange
16 – Mark Mills
15 – Richard Curzon
14 – Steve Hammond
12 – John Twigg
10 – Mike Lisle

Other players who made appearances were:

8 – Bill Martin, 7 – Carl Harrow, 6 – Paul Crosby, 6 – Nick Mathers, 4 – Andy Mills, 2 – Dave Fish, 2 – Nigel Gallagher, 2 – Kenny Hogg, 2 – Jason Naylor, 2 – Peter Taylor, 1 – Rob Childs, 1 – Uncle Tom Cobley

The 91 goals were scored by:

29 - Matt Peacock
8 - Steve Bull
8 – Gavin Simpson
7 – Mike Lisle
6 – John Boyle
6 – Ron Crennell
5 – Richard Curzon
5 – Phil Wells
4 – Mark Mills
3 – John Twigg
3 – Chris Wilson
2 – Bill Martin
2 – Brendan Wren
1 – Martin Byron-Grange
1 – Dave Jordan
1 – Own Goal

The Fair Play League

The final league table is now available on the website at http://www.clubwebsite.co.uk/knebwortholdboysfootballclub/league_table.pl

Sandy won the league though half of their 24 points were obtained by being awarded points from forfeited games. In games played Sandy won 3, drew 3 and lost 2.

We were awarded points from 1 forfeited game and in games played won 6, drew 1 and lost 4.

Knobs 7 Knebworth Dads and Coaches 1

A glorious day, totally unfit for the veteran type football, ended with victory and harmony.
Thanks to those who attended the Fox drinks and thanks to Malcolm for the chicken and etc.

Thanks to Paul, a proper referee, who reffed with effectiveness and humour. There were a few little disagreements needing ironing out from time to time- noffin serious. Well I was standing with a flag up me arse for most of the game so serious flashpoints were effectively and seriously curtailed.
First 20 minutes was competitive in the long grass. Apparently the council lawn mower is broken, anyone want to sponsor a new one?
A desperate, no, despairing, no ,...... dynamic and devastating save from Gavin, with his legs, kept us level. That boy stood up tall and brave!
Goal attempts by us were thwarted by their best player, the linesman, on numerous occasions, including a Brendan square ball for Mike to nod in! A Matt assist put Mark through and on this occasion he netted with aplomb. Matt put us 2-0 up before a steady move advanced down our right to be subsequently netted with a good cross shot. 2-1, which it stayed until half time.
With numerous officially granted drinks breaks and unofficial ones the match ground on. Offside decisions continued to effectively dominate. Offside Matt, yeah I know that bloke's playin you on but he's off the pitch having a drink. On other occasions the sneaky bugger would come back on and intercept. Matt scored another three for himself, lost a ball in a garden before Brendan SURGED forward to hit the sixth. To say he turned on the edge of area with the grace of the battleship Potemkin with a hole in its bottom was to praise his speed, but when he'd completed his pirouhette, with 5 degrees of difficulty, he toe poked accurately into the top corner. Unstoppable! At least Brendan was pleased. Matt scored another, yes he did!
The match wore on to its final denouement, Gavin shading under the sycamores, Richard (man of the match even ahead of 5 goal Matt) rampaging, Steve caressing balls onto careless heads, John bored and dreaming of Foxes to be and Brendan everywhere and nowhere baby, the season melted to an end. Thanks to all who participated and come on down next season and keep your ageing processes at bay.
A canny little turn out at the Fox from which I was rescued by Maggie, Brenda and Ernie ( Dave's dogs- Brenda and Ernie that is , Maggie is my......... better not go on). Did the rest get out before 11 this week?

"Training " outdoors on the Rec will be arranged shortly and a thoughts of the season blog will be forthcoming.

Ron, Brenda, Ernie and all my other little chums

Crawley Green 0 Knobs 1

Ron's away at the British hockling championships and has asked me to fill in.
He is abjectly sorry for his performance on Sunday and has gone into analysis to attempt to understand what he did. He assures me nothing like that has happened before and will never happen again.
Very competitive game, better team won. Apparently they'd been whining on for months about only playing with golden oldies but the first half hour they seemed viagra driven or summat. Probably summat.
A good finish by Richard when played through against a good keeper (ex Watford apparently) proved the game's only goal.
Trevor- excellent handling, stopped everything coming his way.
JB- solid and adventurous.
Dave Fish excellent.
Chris W superb, effervescent and hard.
Phil hamstrung replaced by the late Brendan who proved rock solid showing the virtue of keeping an eye firmly on the ball.
Gavin irrepressible, several pacy surges thwarted by sometimes good and sometimes jammy keeping.
Steve always involved, some silky distribution, never overawed. A series of good corners, at least 10 with no threat offered in the goalmouth.
Peter T- a full 90 minutes will probably have left him a little stiff for the rest of the week or even month.
Dave J everywhere and nowhere baby, pushed, shoved, puffed and panted to effect. Some good defensive headers.
Martin another terrific game especially after ther first 10 minutes.
Well done you bonny lads.

Gazza

Who stole the cricketers' pies?
Nice beer in a packed club.
The a pleasant late noon in the Fox, where Trevor offered to sponsor next season's kit. Strong beer that!
John B, Gavin, Dave and Chris W apparently made it through till 10.30, interesting to have been a fly on the wall at the quiz! They popped to the Red Lion on the way home. There's stalwarts for you. Ron, Steve and Trevor couldn't last the pace.