Faraway Sir Ronald

It's been on and off for years but finally the time has come for Sir Ronald to be put out to pasture in Pembrokeshire and become Faraway Sir Ronald. Plenty of gardening to be done and the drink is already a distant memory. The KNOBS, who are they?

Goodbye Sir Ronald

Goodbye Sir Ronald
Quack quack

Monday 5 October 2015

Rickmansworth 2 Knobs 4

After the failure of Stuart Lancaster's men on Saturday night, the RFU are said to be looking at the approach to tournament football of joint managers Darren Aldrich and James Hobbs. Minutes of pre-match planning saw Knebworth line up with a 4 4 2 formation for this cup match with Rickmansworth.

The personal touch from the managers to get the best from their resources was evident as they picked up Gerry Dempsey from his house 15 mins after the scheduled meet time. No apology from Gerry for poor time keeping, just a generous thanks for the home visit. There was also an arm round the shoulder for late arrivals for Greg "Wallace" Millhouse and Wayne - both casually walking onto the pitch with 20 players in position and the ref about to kick off.  Rickmansworth were probably a little tired by this time having completed numerous warm up drills whilst we counted players and the kids put long shots past Tony.

Last season, most clubs in the league, including ourselves, declined the invitation to play away at Rickmansworth, having seen them record double digit scores in some early fixtures - but this Knebworth team (mostly) holds no fear.  With fourth choice striker Paul and Sergio upfront, there is confidence that we will be able to give the opposition back four a hard time.

Both teams started brightly, knocking the ball around on a small but flat pitch. Much to the bookies surprise, and the non-believers in the Knebworth side, Knebworth took an early lead. The Rickmansworth keeper was only able to parry an excellent shot from Paul, and Sergio tapped in the rebound. Further astonishment followed - Knebworth won a free kick after a foul on Sergio. He's taken 97.7% of Knebworth dead balls in the last 13 years, with 0.06% success rate - so it was no surprise to see Bully ping the free kick into the top corner.  2 - 0, after 25 minutes, could we actually beat the mighty Rickmansworth? Maybe some started to believe it....

But Rickmansworth then got back in the game after a run through the heart of midfield stretched the defence and a pass through allowed an easy finish.

Rickmansworth continued to press hard but the back four and Tony held firm. Tony claimed some crosses and made one important save. Greg tried really hard to give away a penalty, twice in 10 seconds. Upfront Sergio and Paul were excellent, the counter attacking strategy (or default position) was working well.

Continuing the threaten on the break, Knebworth  won a corner. Bully took his 9,564th corner for Knebworth, these corners have produced 3 goals, ever. Bully mis kicked his corner, Sergio was at the near post and flicked it in.  3 - 1, people starting to believe again.

That belief took a dent when Sergio was forced off with an injury, but Steve the hammer Banks was back on the bench after a period away training with the reserves, and who can forget the day he scored four.

More of the same was the cry at half time. Hobbs and Aldrich consulted the statisticians and decided that with no one left on the bench, they would leave things unchanged into the second half.

Knebworth continued to battle hard in the second half, conceding possession but holding a thin orange line to keep Rickmansworth back. Across the pitch everyone dug in and stuck together. Crosses and long passes rained on the back four, but everything was challenged and for all their dominance Rickmansworth did not threaten Tony on many occasions.

The game was nearly sealed when Paul put a mis hit shot from Martyn past the keeper, 4 - 1 to Knebworth was 100-1 bet in William Hill in Knebworth on Saturday lunchtime.

Rickmansworth kept going, scoring another to make it 4 - 2, but that was it, Knebworth were through!

Greg "Wallace" Millhouse was again impressed with the sandwiches - colourful he said. That's called salad said Bully.

Dave Knight gave a lesson in how to win friends and influence people after the game. Step 1) tell centre backs James and Wayne he could find a decent centre back for next week. Step 2) tell Bully his free kick was rubbish and should have been saved easily. For best effect, do this whilst eating your own post match meal with your own bottle of champagne and a single glass. He has a lovely tan though.

Supporters Brendan Wren, Louis Hobbs, Billy Brown, Jack Matthews

6 comments:

Winesman said...

Lay off the Gin; Ricky equalised to make it 1-1 then Bully put us 2-1 up.

Anonymous said...

sorry, lost in the emotion of the cup.
Reports can only guarantee sarcasm, accuracy is a bonus. Apologies to Jono for last week's error.

More Machine than Man said...

Apology accepted Captain Needa.

Anonymous said...

Jono last week, Sergio this week. Paul, most weeks. Think we are over working the front line in training and matches. Bully and Darren need to put in more of a shift in the games.

talking shite said...

Who are all these people, where's Brendan Wren the stalwart?

Love my own voice said...

What a shit report. Make it concise and stop trying to be funny.