Knobs 4 Goldings 0

Shortest match report ever to match lowest comments ever, last week. I'm rushing off north but before I do well done to the chaps today , an excellent performance (perhaps we ought to have scored more ) and no there's nothing wrong with my eyesight. I've had a good few chuckles in reminiscing about the game- despair at the condition of some  Homo not very sapiens, the planet must have better options as custodians otherwise wiv nae fookin chance!
Incredible!
Woody notched another couple, did you see the pullback on him, incredible. Why didn't yiz aal moan an caal the perpetrator a fookin cunt. Both nice and tidy and paying dividends for speed of thought and foot.
Steve scored a lovely placed shot at the end of an exciting move and John Boyle latching onto a loose ball thrashed home a smashing first timer. Incredible.
Chris Wilson and James were simple towers at the back reining in the young bustler with aplomb. Class!
Alistair and Twiggy , superb full back displays and always helped in going forwards- Alistair long diagonal centre to Woody found him wanting for once and a Twiggy advance and cross to far post inexplicably headed wide by the towering Vinnie. Incredible.
Excellent wide play from Nick and Mr Boyle as industrious in helping out defensively as they were imaginative going forward. John looked very sprightly or was it a touch of whippets and carthorses? Was he saying here bonny lad hev a carrot then nipping past- a really enjoyed watching.
Nick soldiered on injured until giving way 5 minutes to go . Well done.
Darren in the middle was everywhere, intercepting loads and tackling successfully on many occasions. He didn't show at the pub, presumably went home for some form of transplant.
You were individually and as a team simply to good for them. Perhaps you were concentrating on the purpose of the game better than them. They seemed to be more concerned with haranguing the poor old.............. Incredible!
Tony had very little to do- one blinding save, tipped over but he was very active in the encouragement and distribution departments. Vital.
Am away north noo so hev a nice week bonny lads and yiz soon.
Mr Magoo.