Faraway Sir Ronald

It's been on and off for years but finally the time has come for Sir Ronald to be put out to pasture in Pembrokeshire and become Faraway Sir Ronald. Plenty of gardening to be done and the drink is already a distant memory. The KNOBS, who are they?

Goodbye Sir Ronald

Goodbye Sir Ronald
Quack quack

Sunday, 29 January 2012

Knobs 5 Sandridge Rovers 1

A keenly fought contest deservedly won by the home side. Never seemed to be a feeling that this would be anything other than Knobs day even though at halftime the score stood at 1-1.
First half some neat approach play was exhibited by both sides without either keeper being particularly busy. A flighted Bully corner was emphatically headed in by Vinnie, helped in no little way by a speedy decoy run to the front post by Gavin. More of this sort of initiative at set pieces please. Static is bad! They broke for an equaliser, a nice move, well finished. Knobs desperate appeals for offside fell on Brendan's deaf ears (he being linesman at the time).
Voices were raised in anger at half time in the home ranks as demon Dave, the new Arsene or was that Arse struggled to get his points across. Something along the lines of "don't pass to Bully or summat....". I were miles away trying as ever to adopt a posture of neutrality whilst cleaning sputum out of me whistle so I'm hearing this second hand like.
Second half we kicked down and raided frequently and often effectively, scoring another four and perhaps should have had more.
Gavin really started to motor and arguably was the main difference between the two sides, they had noone remotely as quick either defending or going forward. Tearing downfield and in from the left he was scythed down from behind as he approached the goal . Steve Bull made no mistake from the spot. A similar run saw him in on goal again before the last man buggered him, just outside the area this time. Steve's free kick , left to right, was a beauty with height and pace into the top corner.
Another Gavin sprint saw him kicked down from behind just feet short of the try line. Another penalty another Bully goal. Mr Bull has achieved a hattrick and this on a morning when Tony and himself put a whole net up by themselves! The professionals!
Moaning re refereeing?
I can only note that not once did I butcher Gavin down from behind. The opposition's intent was to stop him scoring by foul means. They did not care if he, during his descent to earth, was injured! People are amazing. I rest my case. Except to say at least two of the fouls on Gavin when he was in on goal would have led, according to our modern rules, to two men being sent off. Kindness and lenience were not acknowledged.
The fifth goal was a piece of slack defending on their part. A cross ball was ignored except by Gavin-pants-on fire who kept it in near the by line , squared it across goal for Chris Cox to sidefoot home unopposed.
Dave's use of the ball from his hands (he was keeper) was a tad on the slow side and was irking the oppo. We did learn that Dave can count to 10, some even said 11, and next week he starts on his letters. After a warning his distribution thereafter was exemplary. I don't like teasing opposition when you're on top, very poor form, just go for the next goal that's how you show class. Olay out, play up and at 'em in.
Some good moves today, particularly one leading to one of Gavin's slaloms. Jamie defended in his own area, flicking over an attacker's head, thrust forward, retrieved the ball and sent Gav on his merry way. Very pleasing.
Man of match , despite the emphatic dispatching of two penalties and a free kick by Steve, must have been Gavin I would have thought. What do yous think?
A good turn out out by both sides in the pub where the absentee list for next week grew at an alarming rate. It's me and Brendan with Dave in goal.
TIP of the week, "Don't tackle Vinny!"
Yer ould mate.
PIKEY

85 comments:

It's a fucking joke said...

Bully scored Three and set up another and still Gavin get's MOM?

Gavin said...

I completely agree.

All ears said...

Overheard one of their team say that he had never heard a home refree call an opposing team's player a 'cunt' before. Welcome to Knebworth.

Andy Towsend said...

Vinnie, Bully and Chris Cox played some lovely stuff in midfield today. Can Chris Wilson get his centre berth back? It must be lovely for the manager to have these selection dilemmas.

knob of knobs said...

Bully mom for me as even though Gavin was unstoppable in the second half, well stoppable by foul means, it was all done in Bullys boots.

objectivity personified said...

OK Steve mom it's a fine line. Can't accuse me of anti Bullism.

Robin Van Bully said...

Well done RvB. At last you get the credit you deserve.

Having a laugh said...

Bully MOM, fuck off he was at fault for their goal. Giving the ball away again from a pointless short throw.He left their number 4 more often than not.I'll give paise for the free kick and anyone of us can take penalties.MOM for me was Vinny link play was excellent puts us all to shame when tackling and a great headed goal. Moan of the Match Bully.

Gavin said...

I completely agree.

and another thing said...

If it wasn't for Bully's birthday game we could have had 20 points and been 3rd in the league. Team player!! Think on.

Blame seeker said...

I thought that was a free weekend...what happened fixture secretary?

Tony said...

Who is the useless dick of a fixture sceretary? sack him.

Vinny mom? you must be joking he moves less than bully.

Gavin said...

I completely agree.

Anthony Waldorf said...

Got to say Steve was a plank this week and you won't find me tackling Vinny. Infact you wont find me tackling anyone.

Steven Statler said...

Sorry for moaning the whole of the first half and half time. I was meant to moan in the second half but ran out of puff.

ancient one said...

I would moan a lot but I'm dead!

Des said...

Nice to see Dave using the blog again, can we start slatting him or will he go off crying again

Big knob said...

Don't fuck with the Don

Beaky said...

Don't fuck with the family

The Don said...

Fuck with me you will swim with the fish or be sub

I was there said...

The Don, yeah ok. I thought you were going to cry when Bully shouted at you at half time

sinking stone said...

would rather be in a sub than outside with the fishes.

Don said...

I couldnt argue with bulky as he walked off while i was berrating him. Says alot.

Tony said...

Fight fight fight

Beaky said...

First time Bully has been quiet for a while, sshhhhhhhhh!

Anonymous said...

100 miles an hour down a dead end street.
over and out.

Cunt said...

dave6 darren 7 chris g 8 tony 7 Alistair 6 john 6 steve 8 chris c 8 jamie 7 vinnie8 gavin 9
Bill 6 brendan 6 chris w 7
Mom the referee- fuckin pikey homer
everything he gave had nebworth written on it.

twas ron wot dun it said...

Fixture secretary admitted guilt over fixture mix up. It's rocket science you know arranging these games!
Steve stepped in to fill a vacancy and I cancelled the league fixture to honour the arranged game with the All Stars.
If the league was that important we would all have a different approach to games- remember as far as we're concerned it's a block of fixtures arranged for us.

And-!!!! said...

Still would have been third

Onlooker said...

Dave is the Sam Allardyce of vets football. He is ruining the beautiful game with has negative tatics and time wasting. Twat! bring back Sir Ron.

Gavin said...

I completely agree.

The real Gavin said...

I completely agree.

Are you mad? said...

Dont know what game you were watching but RvB was the best player by far! Only 'real' footballer in the side.

End the Blog said...

Once again this blog is becomming negative and pointless. Seems that John B has had more time on his hands this week. Before you write it John. "Yes Gavin Agrees" We fucking Know.

The blog is Shit said...

The blog is Shit

The Blog is Rubibish said...

The Blog is Rubibish

I hate the Blog said...

I hate the Blog

Ill keep writing said...

Ill keep writing

Im not giving up said...

Im not giving up

One for the Road said...

One for the Road

A long way to go said...

theres A long way to go

Up your Arse said...

Up your Arse

Bye Bye said...

Bye Bye

Roy of the Rovers said...

Together Everyone Achieves More!
Bully's boots were the MOM - scored 3 and set up all 5. FACT!

Gavin said...

I completely agree.

my nappy froze said...

What a day. powdery snow and the fish were so upset- have started feeding them far too early. Please forgive me, winter undoubtedly lies ahead.
Oooh the bloggie children have been hereabouts saying silly things. WE LOOOOOVE IT!

Anonymous said...

What's the matter, you're all hopeless. Get real.

she knows you know said...

Bully can caress a cute little pass you know.

Anonymous said...

He couldnt caress a pussy.

Anonymous said...

how do you know, peeping again?
I've heard..

strategist said...

Does Dave have handcuffs?

Anonymous said...

Last minute transfer day deal. New goalkeeper Billy the Fish signs for Knebworth Old Boys. Another Dave Jordan master stroke.

Mr P Vert said...

Lovely! Is Billy a sex toy?
Am happy with just handcuffs.

Anonymous said...

Last minute transfer deal...Robbies Hot Sausage from Trussells in, Bully out. The boss wants more movement in the middle of the park. Harsh? I should coco but the boy's done good this year. He knows his onions. Cider boy is a potential loan signing from FC White Lightning. 45 minutes left 'til the final deadline.

Anonymous said...

Last minute transfer deal. John Boyle signs for Blunham Vets. He will be their new mascot he will be wearing a baby pink and aubergine tutu

Anonymous said...

John Boyles mouth transferred to Therfield, Knobs keep the beak,

It makes perfect sense said...

Feed the Bull, and he will score.

Messy said...

Feed the Bull and he will pop.

rags of red said...

never enter a field with a bull in it. i am no longer available.

forgotten knob said...

i am available sunday

Stan said...

Steve is not fat he is just big boned

steve night said...

Please don't get obsessed with Steve, he'll only moan more.
Steve Steve Steve Steve where did I put my Steve? Ah Steve it is.

worried said...

Anyone seen Steve, he should be moaning somewhere.

harsh but Steve said...

Of course Steve moans! He is playing with you lot!

Anonymous said...

but we love you steve, we don't moan at you do we, you old grizzler.

dave said...

I am not available sunday

Anonymous said...

No excuses!

Steve said...

Just read the blog,you really are a bunch of cunts. You have to take it to far Dave.

Thank god it's friday said...

Leave Dave alone, he's off to work today so will be very tired this evening, oh and the blog will be quiet!

listening tom said...

Heard John in his garden hot tub last night, Lots of groaning and moaning. Steve in there as well!

mr abominable said...

Its gonna snow. listen to that Yeti moan.

dave at work said...

Sitting on the toilet having my first break this blog has gone a bit too far this week. I dont think the will b played sunday and hopefully we get the points

The Health and Safety brigade said...

We always play even when it's dangerous. You're all mad.

flutter lover said...

Blog gone far? Where's it been?
Nothing controversial in it, noone got killed or maimed, every knob has a skin like an armadillo so let's jus lerrit rip!
HELLO BIG BOY do you moan or do you take it silently?

dave at home said...

game on Sunday has been called off

Dave said...

Game back on

the real dave said...

game off now

Dave said...

Game back on

Dave at the station said...

they should all be along soon, looking forward to it today

dave in the snow said...

no one here yet

snow dancer said...

Unbeaten run continues onto February- unchanged side next week?

Dave said...

and with the same kit washer!!

Bing said...

"It's beginning to look alot like Christmas"

Dave said...

not the same side next week as we should have a few of the better players available!!

Dave said...

Game back on