Happy New Year and winning again.
I'd been away walking the Pembrokeshire Coastal Path and didn't expect to play but on the day I did due to illness of youngsters and non availability. It was enjoyable to enter 2008 pulling on the kit alongside other enthusiasts and winning-easily- to boot.
A sluggish game, obvious reasons, together with clashing strips, they wore red we wore orange, a hellish low lying sun and a small, tight and narrow pitch which required tight, patient passing.
They hardly challenged, bar the initial enthusistic 15 minutes. Defence more than coped, Trevor up for everything poked his way, Roy, who has been ill, and looked it, played well, Chris G, Brendan and Steve were solid, which left those ahead with the task of defeating the festive blues and winning the game. Matty scored one from a tight angle, the third, and assisted in the other two- he said I should mention this, though the first thrashed into an open goal goal by Chris Wilson, should initially have been Matt's. The second was run in from the half way line and finished with aplomb by Gavin, who again gives me hope in my dotage, such a self deprecating bloke. He's got pace and energy to light up Knebworth but he's been fraternising with M. Boyle and has caught the gout. What is that ?
Steve Bull raced in to get on the end of a Matt cross yet from 4 centimetres in front of an open goal missed the ball- a bobble? I don't think so. I thought I'd mention that. Matt and Steve don't drink in January by the way- some New Age thing, John Boyle doesn't drink in January some illness thing, so cheers to you all from a man of consistency and balance.
Brendan is in Vietnam and Cambodia this week think well of him amid their equivalent of curried donkey nobs.
I was considered dirtiest player on the pitch having felled two of the opposition with the Geordie elbows (they all agreed that in the bar- I can tek it) and enjoyed a little bit of crappioso from the oppos. They could narf fackin winge, the old bastards. If yi canna tek it pack it in yi wallies. Mind you I enjoyed scything down that midfielder, he used to be so quick and creative two years ago, he's fucked now at 40. He winged a lot, I liked that.
We hit the woodwork a lot and Mark Mills took the kit.
If I've missed owt out, sorry.
Anyone want to play away to Royston and Carlos, the knacker Dan, next week get in touch, all applicants fairly considered on grounds of ability and having a car. If yi canna stand the post-festive heat gerroot thi fuckin kitchen.
Al awa thi noo for a glass o stout- on thi wagon be buggered.
Captain Ahab
18 comments:
Gout sufferers lack a sufficient amount of a digestive enzyme called uricase, which oxidizes the insoluble uric acid into a highly soluble compound allowing the uric acid to be expelled from the body.
A Gout attack does not happen overnight, but is the result of weeks, months, even years of more uric acid being created daily than your system can dispose of.
The body sees uric acid as a needed substance since it protects our DNA. When our system becomes over-saturated and uric acid has accumulated in the tissue and blood supply, crystals begin to form between the bone joints causing damage to the synovial fluid sacks, this results in creating an infection that causes the severe pain of an acute gout attack.
Does a good fucking shite help?
missed from 4cm? i bet he wouldnt have missed a trussells sausage from 4m let alone 4cm
Do jelly babies help?
Did Ron have some Guardian magazines hidden up his sleeves for extra impact? Surely those ageing elbows couldn't have caused that much damage! It was great to see that aggression in the middle of the field though. Keep it up Ron! Like watching Chopper Harris in his prime.
synovial fluid sacks!! I like the sound of that ant going spare.
I have fluid in my sacks but it is not synovial.
I have jovial fluid in my sacks for all my little playmates.
I have little playmates in my sacks full of all my fluids!
I have pork, rusk and seasoning in my sacks for all my customers.
I haven't got any sacks so I'm overflowing with not a little embarrassment not to mention stickiness.
have i had my dinner?
Yes thankyou please senile knob and your sacks seem to be dribbling pity you can't.
Ron for Newcastle Manager!
if ron goes can i have the knobs job?
Big Sam on way to Knebworth , Geremi has made an offer on wor hoose, Barton spotted picking up dog shit in the rec (community service) and Alan Smith seen gorging in Trussells.
Well Sam wasn't really up to that job. How will Shearer get the much vaunted experience sitting on Match of the Day showing his burgeoning bollocks to the nation? Not ready! Give him a try and get the saga over with before we turn to the real Messiah. It's got to be Brian Clough- real Messiahs can come back from wherever he's been resting up.
Long shot Peter Beardsley- a canna see Harry Redknap exchanging the balmy palm tree walks of Bournemouth for the bracing gales and unintelligible bonhomie of Whitley Bay.
Sack most of the players now, just give them away, just say fuck off wi divvint want yiz, yer aal imposters. Bring in Ameobi, a true Geordie, let the lad play ees own game, let him weave. If he doesn't turn it on al be surprised. Make sure Owen, Geremi, Nugget Brain, Carr, Babayaro (is he still stealing wages?), Cacapa and Enrique (Marcellino's brother and Luque's cousin) are shunted oot on the forst dilly wagon.
Whoever takes over nae mair Spaniards! Did yi see Enrique's 'tackles' against Stoke? E wor scared o smudging that geet yellow paint stripe doon thi middle of ee's back.
Clarion call of the Toon.
"Get rid, get rid, get rid...".
An wi not talkin aboot thi baal Sam.
PS- make sure the next manager comes nakedly alone and not with a possee of 'scientific helpers' mind you its Ashley's money if he doesn't mind paying them aal off in a couple of months, fair enough. But do we need a cast of thousands of hangers on 'helping' to make the game more difficult than it really is?
And what does Terry McDermott do? For the jokerman yi wanna knaa whe's died when yi see im in the dugoot!
Gavin in goal on Sunday- now "the Cat" admits to being referred to as "The Clockwork Mouse" in his previous keeper incarnation. Hope he's a quick mouse- watch this space!
Sandy beat Goldings in league so our hope of winning it is now in our own hands, starting by beating Sandy on their shitheap next week.
is big sam about? i need to speak to him urgently. i think i have a job for him.
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